The Definition of Success

I am a very motivated person by nature.  When I was young I relished the opportunity to participate in sports and experienced some great success.  I was driven and competitive.  In my adult life, I'm a salesman.  I carry a quota.  I'm compensated on how I perform against a goal.  I have lots of interests and am always trying to find a new niche to be successful in.  I'm always pushing myself to achieve something more.

But what is it that I'm actually striving for?  How will I know when I'm truly successful?

If I look at myself in the worldly way, my record is mixed.  I've had some successes and some serious setbacks, and to be honest, my setbacks have come in the areas that I most desperately wanted to succeed in.

Here are some examples:

1.  Sports career:  Ended for health reasons in the 10th grade.  Never able to reach my full potential.
2.  Mission.  Was sick the whole time and experienced serious challenges to my faith and testimony.
3.  Marriage.  Ended in divorce after 23 years and six children.

I could go on about my setbacks but I don't want to.  How would it help?  If I look again at those same setbacks I can find enormous success..

1.  Sports Career.  Learned to drive forward to reach difficult goals.  Learned the value of teamwork.
2.  Mission.  Learned compassion and love for different kinds of people.  Learned to not be so hard on myself.
3.  Marriage.  Became a father of 6 incredible human beings who have brought great love and joy to my life.

How would you judge my success based on these observations?

Well, if you look at what I value most which is my relationship with God, my family, and my own consistent progress, I can say I have done well.  I am, what I would consider, a success.

When I look around me, there will always be people who seem to be more successful.  They may be more financially rewarded, they may be better tennis players, they may have solid and loving marriages, they may have this and that and the list could go on and on.

The conditions on this earth are never exactly the same for any of us.  We have our own unique personalities, our own unique strengths and weaknesses.  Also, our opportunities vary as well.

Here's another example:

There are two salesmen that work for ABC company.  Salesman #1 has an incredible year.  He blows out his number.  Salesman #2 works hard but comes up short, 5% below his number for that same year.  Does logic dictate that salesman #1 is automatically more successful?  Not necessarily.  A lot has to do with circumstances, individual conditions in their territories, funding etc. etc.

What really counts for us as it relates to true success is what we do with what we are given.  That's what the Lord will judge us on.  What did I do with the hand I've been dealt?  We each have opportunities no matter what setbacks we have suffered.  What are we going to do now with those opportunities?

In many ways, divorce from a difficult and painful marriage is in reality, a fantastic opportunity to reinvent, rebuild, and to do things we could never do before.

Would I have ever have written this blog if it weren't for my divorce?  Would I have ever met the hundreds of beautiful people I've met now, if I had stayed in my difficult marriage?  The answer is no and the real truth is that I am successful and so are you if you choose to see it and you choose to make it a reality.

Let's make it a reality.  Define what is truly important and go for it.  There is no question that we will all be successful.